Tuesday, November 25, 2003

CRAZY PEOPLE SHOP HERE!




See that smile? She's laughing because so many crazy people shop at Fry's. The were out in full force last night because Thanksgiving is looming in the shadows and everyone was compelled to be out shopping for all kinds of goodies at 7:00 last night. The first freak to enter into picture was this little old lady holding a written list of goods. She approaches Miranda and asks her if she knows where the milk is. Miranda was a bit puzzled by this seeing that there were employees standing in the vicinity and she was dressed nothing like them. We sent her in the direction of the milk and that was that for then. Next were the white trailer park people with the dirty kids lookin' fer the pork n' beans. Then there was the lady with kids in her shopping cart who was pushing them real fast, then suddenly distracted she just let go and the kids went crashing into frosted flakes cereal display. Around this point I started looking for hidden cameras and that guy from candid camera. Enter the lady with the list of items that approached Miranda about 30 minutes earlier. She still had the list, still was without a shopping cart, and was still frantically looking for things, nothing in hand. I was sure at this point the guy with the camera was coming out for sure. A couple of other things happened that I honestly can't remember because that was yesterday and I've had a full day today. If I remember I'll post it here.

GRANDMA OXFORD


Her funeral is tomorrow but I'm too broke to fly back for it. A lot of my earliest memories are of being at grandma Oxfords farm. I have one memory of being about three or four and my uncle Rolie was left with me and my older brother Jeff. Jeff must have been about five or six. Anyway, my  uncle who was about thirteen was going to make biscuits the way grandma did. He ended up making a mess and burning the hell out of those things. I remember my grandmother being totally pissed off and yelling. I also remember her chasing him and my uncle Clayton around the house when I was small because they were fighting. Other memories include sitting on her lap in the middle of the night during a really bad storm, her catfish stink bait (nothing in the world is more disgusting than this stuff), home made butter and ice cream, her cooking in general, and how much she meant to me as a kid.

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