Friday, September 05, 2003


Worked a cocktail party with James tonight which could simply be the easiest function I've ever worked. We had potato chips, pretzels, party mix, and nuts to put out for around sixty people. That's it. We spent a lot of time talking about his latest trip to Thailand, religion, and current events. James is cool people, and he's not a mindless idiot like some of the people I work with. At the end of the evening he comes over to me and holds up a wad of cash and starts thumbing through it like he's going to pay for something, I notice a bunch of $100 bills and I'm sure I made some stupid remark about what he was going to to with all that cash. He tells me he found it on the floor. I asked if he was pulling my leg and he insisted that he just found it. There must have been over $500 worth of cash in this money clip. So, he handed it to the guy who seemed to be hosting the party and he ran after the guy who it belonged to. Now if it was my money and I dropped that much cash on the ground and you found it and brought it back to me I think I'd be tipping you a minimum of $20! That didn't happen though. So we finished up work and went over to catch the last of the football game with Dennis at his house. ShamBam was there and I guess we had just missed Joe R. by about five minutes. Game ended and James had to get going. We turned on the public access cable channel and started watching a closeted gay guy talking about how great Jesus is. I'm not kidding! The background was even decorated to achieve maximum gayness. This guy kept talking about how he was a vessel and god was filling his vessel everyday. He went on and on about how god could fill your vessel too if you would only let him. I started to think it was a skit at one point, but it wasn't. Calling this guy redundant would be an understatement. I take it that god's filling a lot of vessels these days. Then he started talking about the flesh. Oh the dreaded flesh! The sins of the flesh, more filling, dirty thoughts, more filling, if you can only resist, filling, impure worldly thoughts, filling, filling, filling. Damn dude, go out and get yourself some hot little stud boy and do your own filling. It's too bad Dennis quit drinking five years ago becuase there was a drinking game involved in this, you simply take a swig every time he says filling. So my advice to this young lad who was blathering away tonight on public access is the following. Stop with the lisp and flailing your hands and wrists in that manner, it's not a strong selling point. Quit worrying about the sins of the flesh and the impure thoughts, just go with it. We came to the conclusion that your repressing your true feelings, it's more than obvious. Take a deep breath and go with it, it will be okay.

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