Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Had a very disturbing dream two nights ago that Brandon was trying to tell me he loved me. I was done with him at that point and would have nothing to do with him. I kept pushing him away and telling him to just go, that it was too late. It set a horrible mood for the rest of the day, really bad mood. I felt horrible and could do nothing about it. Anyway, going to start and experiment with lucid dreaming, going to record them as soon as they happen. Will type them out here. Hope I can get back there to tell him that I didn't mean it. Made me feel a bit like Abraham selling out Isaac in the bible. I'd never sacrifice my kid if the voices told me to! The bible is crazy. Anyway, been dreaming tons this past week. I should have been on the ball and recorded them all....
Going to try and meet THE FOOL from the tarot card in my dream this week. First thing I will try to do.