VIRGIN MY ASS

So, this is the Virgin (still up for debate) Mary and it's a miracle as well. Whatever! Maybe my lack of faith doesn't allow me to see it, or maybe my rational mind lets me know it's just a window that got messed up when some chemicals got into a broken seal. I can see the face of Charles Manson in this window:

No lie! It's a bit abstract, but take a look at this picture and look at the one above? I know, I'm reaching, but so are the thousands of mindless Christians that pull this kind of shit every year. Take a look into my pants and you might see the snake from the garden of Eden. I think he's winking at you! I'm no virgin by the way.

I'M DA MAN!

A lady asked me for my phone number tonight! She was nothing to look at but I'm flattered none the less. Hell, I'm nothing to look at! Anyway, at this rate I'll have hot chicks after me by the end of the year! First I had a 60ish year old lady hitting on me about a month ago, now this lady, and it's nothing but up from there! Hope it's some hot Asian chick, that would make it special.